So
this morning I was sitting in bed thinking about something my mom had said to
me the other day, everything is going to get better you just need to take it
day by day. Now for all of you who read the last blog post, or who just plain out
know me and know my life, I did end up having the 2nd surgery. Let me
enlighten you, the day of surgery I get to the hospital they take 8 things of
blood (keep in mind I hate needles) then the CNA comes back and says oh… I
forgot to get another one so we need to poke you again, so scratch the 8 they
took 9 things of blood. Then we just have to wait finally get down to the
pre-surgery spot this time I know what to expect so even though I don’t want to
be there I at least am prepared. I go in for the surgery then wake up in what
seems like 10 minutes later but it was really about 4 hours. They opened my old
incision, they put in 3 new tiny ones 2 by my hips and one by my belly button. So
I stay overnight in the hospital but Saturday I’m feeling pretty good compared
to the last surgery so I get to go home! I get home then Sunday I start feeling
sort of weird… it progressively gets worse. By Monday my mom is pretty worried
she calls the doctor and they want me to come in on Tuesday. So wake up on
Tuesday… my mom tries to get me to eat nope not going to happen is what I am
thinking nothing in the world sounded good at all. But I needed to take my pain
medication so I ate a poptart it took me a half hour to eat one. I tell my mom
I feel like I am going to pass out I almost do when we are walking to the car.
By the time we take the hour n half drive down to Salt Lake I’m done for. I get
in the doctor’s office almost past out in her chair and she decides in 5
minutes that I need to be readmitted to the hospital.
My
mom calls my brothers, boyfriend and a couple other people; then just like that
I’m in a hospital bed. So then the nurses are trying to put an IV in my arm but
my left arm which they would normally use it all bruised up since I had just
barely had the 2nd surgery, so they go for the right arm and they
can’t get it in. They ended up calling this other nurse who is supposed to be
the best at it even she took forever and was moving around the needle in my
arm. I was on the verge of tears by the time it was over. Then my doctor comes
in and says I need to have a CT scan they wanted me to drink that nasty drink
when I could barely hold down anything. So there I am with my mom and brother
Trevor who rushed out of work to be there and they are both trying to coax me
into drinking it. Finally I drank about half of it, but I couldn’t drink
anymore. I go in for the scan, all it shows to my doctor is I have some gas
bubbles in there which is normal I just had surgery right? I missed lunch so my
mom, Trev, and other brother Colby had gone down to the Subway after I went in
for the scan to bring back some food. I didn’t even finish a 6inch when I
started to throw up… then I got my food privileges taken away. That night I was in so much pain they asked
me on a scale of 1-10 it felt like 15, it took them hours to get my pain level
under control and all I could do was try not to cry which I wasn’t very successful
at. Then its Wednesday oh great the doctor wants to do a regular scan now, so I
go down the techs want me to hold this thing up and stand straight first off. I
couldn’t even stand straight or hold anything so I ended up having to lie on
this table and turn on my side and trust me when you’re in pain it is about the
last thing you can stand to do. So that scan showed a little more gas… but no
nothing is being done about it yet. Then the nurses I have that day think I am
in so much pain because I haven’t had a bowel movement so they are shoving this
milk of mag. Stuff down my throat and some other pill but I ended up throwing
it all up almost every single time they gave it to me. Obviously that wasn’t
the problem. SO then since I couldn’t keep that stuff down my water privileges
were taken away from me. All I had left was good old ice chips. Well, Thursday
comes around oh yay lets go get another scan which shows there is more air than
before. Finally my mom who was at my side every day is pissed and a lot of
people know my mom she doesn’t get pissed a lot but when it comes to her kids
that isn’t something you mess around with. She kept telling the doctors I was
getting worse and they weren’t listening to her up until Thursday when she
finally said you do something and you do it now! So my doctor decides it’s time
to go back in for another surgery. Bye bye ice chip privileges, Thursday night
at 9 p.m. I went in for the 3rd surgery I didn’t get done until
about midnight. Turns out the spot my appendix had been (they were removed with
my tumor the first surgery) had ruptured and was leaking toxins into my body. When
I woke up I had a tube coming out of my stomach literally, and one out of my
nose I never saw myself with the tube in my nose but by the sad looks I got I
knew I must’ve looked pretty bad. So in this surgery they ended up reopening
all 4 of my incisions and the long one I had was completely reopened.
Now
during my stay at the hospital I had already had enough but to top it off one CNA
I had when I asked to shower literally turned on my shower as hot as it could
go didn’t get me any new clean stuff or nothing and left me to fend for myself
in the shower when I could barely move. By the time I had yelled for my mom to
come help me I was so mad and fed up I freaked out. When my nurse came in I
said I DON’T EVER WANT THAT CNA AGAIN! Now keep in mind that wasn’t the only wrong
thing she did she ignored me every single time I asked for something and was
extremely rude to my family. This all happened Thursday. Then I had a nurse who
kept telling me you need to get up and walk or you won’t be able to go home. Well
first off lady I know you’re trying to help but I can barely make it to the
bathroom how do you expect me to walk down the hall. ( I didn’t day that to her
but trust me I wanted too) The whole almost 6 days I was there I only had one
nurse that actually offered to walk with me, the other ones expected my family
or for me to just go by myself. Then the same nurse who kept saying that told
my favorite CNA to be quiet when the CNA had been explaining something to me.
Then
comes Sunday the doctors are saying I might be able to go home soon I’m
thinking GET ME OUT OF HERE NOW! I’m just sitting there when I notice my arm
with the IV is huge swollen up and everything, turns out my IV broke in my arm
because the nurses hadn’t changed it. My vein had given away because of all the
hardcore stuff they had to pump in my body since I hadn’t been able to eat or
drink. So now all of a sudden they can’t put in another IV because it wouldn’t
last through the day I have no way to get pain medication so all of a sudden
they give me back food privileges keep in mind I haven’t ate since Tuesday and
they all of a sudden want me to hold down a full meal or I can’t get pain
medication or go home. For those of you who don’t know in the hospital they
give you a paper you fill out for your meals and you circle your choices all
that jazz well I don’t see why they even brought me a paper because every meal
I circled they brought me something else completely. So on top of being forced
to eat I wasn’t even able to eat what I wanted. But finally Sunday night I get
to go home. Monday morning my pain is about a 10 I have a fever my mom calls
the doctor and they tell her what to do. Finally we figured out how to get my
pain level under control and just had to stick with the same routine. Now
eating was a fiasco I didn’t want too but I had too. I’d lost a lot of weight,
my skin was pale I just was not looking good.
Now it’s been almost 3 weeks since I had that 3rd surgery I
still can’t eat a whole lot, but I have to eat more every day to get back to
normal. Since I wasn’t fully recovered from the first one or even remotely
recovered from the 2nd it will take me about 8-12 weeks until I
finally start to feel better. I have a lot of restrictions on me and even now I
am still in pain some days. My doctor recommended I take the semester off
school since I can’t even carry a backpack or drive… I’ve had to take the
suggestion. I can’t work for about another month or so, the apartment I had in
SLC I had to give up because I can’t live alone right now. So for a girl who just
barely turned 20 a week ago today this is a lot to take in. 3 surgeries within
6 weeks, not being able to care for myself or do the things I normally can by
myself, having to put her dreams aside for a while to recover it has been
pretty hard to take in. I’m not going to say I don’t cry about it because I do.
My friends don’t really understand what I’ve been through or am still going
through nor to be completely honest do I think a lot of them even care. My mom
also said to me the other day you have friends that care about you it just isn’t
the ones you though would. She was right it’s the best friends that live in
Arizona, Vegas, Salt Lake City, Cedar City and then a couple of my best friends
from high school that were there for me not the people I had expected. Then my
family if it wasn’t for them I have no idea how I would of handled it all my
mom is honestly the best she has been by my side through it all and my brothers
have been there every step of the way helping in any way they knew how. Then
Tyson (boyfriend) even though he went back to St. George to his life he has
been here every step of the way trying to cheer me up, or sitting with me when I
cry but even better when I kept telling him how ugly I felt especially when
that tube was in my nose he told me I was beautiful or pretty every single day.
But to all of you who kept me in your prayers, and thoughts I thank you I
really appreciate.
So…
yeah my life has pretty much been turned upside down for the moment, and like
my mom said I have to take it day by day. Even though I can’t go back to my old
life right now, and can’t for a couple months I need to keep my head held high
and stay positive because eventually I will get better.
